A few years ago, some friends were talking about New Year Resolutions and I thought about what they were about. Basically, it is a list of things that you'd like to achieve and I started thinking about what it was about me that has stopped or would stop me doing such things in the usual course of life. And that lead me to think about what I would need to change to be somebody who just goes about doing the things I want to do when I want to do them.

So I started a list of observations and thoughts about what characteristics I needed or what things I should keep in mind. It was a list of behaviours I should aim for and behaviours I should alter. It was a list of things to keep in mind and consider.

It ended up as a sort of charter for myself - a way that I wished to live my life. As time went on, the list changed as things dropped off or were added as occasion dictated. It was a living list. Some things are on it as reminders and some as goals.

The version below is from 2008 and I am thinking of revisiting it and producing a list would suit who I am today.

  A little bit of flirting is good for you  
  Accept that it's "just their nature"  
  Accept with the same grace that you give with  
  Aim for further than you wish to go  
  Always thank people  
  Always trust your instincts  
  Answer the question that you know is being asked  
  Appreciate what you have rather than worry about what you don't have  
  Ask yourself what the reasoning is behind what you are doing  
  Be honest  
  Be more impulsive  
  Be open to criticism  
  Be spontaneous every now and then  
  Concentrating on the positives helps their impact to grow  
  Counteract routine dictating your actions  
  Don't accept your weaknesses - address them  
  Don't dwell too long on failure  
  Don't let annoyances fester - understand and address them instead  
  Don't believe all that you hear  
  Don't expect more from others than you give of yourself  
  Don't fear making yourself vulnerable  
  Don't manipulate through words or actions  
  Don't mock the dreams of others  
  Don't put others down to further yourself  
  Don't stay in attitudes or places that aren't positive  
  Encourage people  
  Even if you don't get your own way, be gracious  
  Everyone is worth meeting at least once - and it's great when once isn't enough  
  If people don't appreciate you or what you do, then walk away from them  
  If people don't respect you, it may be because you have done nothing to earn their respect  
  If somebody chooses who to be nice to, then they are not nice  
  If somebody doesn't like you, it may be their issue  
  If you are doing things to impress others, then you are doing them for the wrong reason  
  If you don't like somebody, you don't have to mention it  
  If you don't know where you are going, at least enjoy the journey until you find out  
  If you find something annoying in somebody, look at yourself for the same characteristics  
  If you have a task that you don't like, then get it out of the way  
  If you lose your temper, then you also lose your focus  
  Intolerance comes from arrogance  
  Invite experience and embrace adventure  
  It doesn't matter if you fail, as long as you tried  
  Judge on merits - not against your own laws  
  Just because you expect something, doesn't mean that it should happen  
  Just because you want something, doesn't mean that you deserve it  
  Justice is not your responsibility  
  Keep confidences  
  Keep your head up and look around  
  Know where fact ends and fiction begins  
  Life always starts from now  
  Look at what you are being criticised for before putting too much value into it  
  Look into people's eyes  
  Make extra time to do the things that make you happy  
  Many things are none of your business - recognise them  
  Motive is more important than the outcome  
  Patience, patience, patience  
  Pay attention to your surroundings  
  Pretending to be something doesn't make it so  
  Remember names  
  Respect yourself and others  
  Revenge doesn't address the issue  
  Saving something for a special occasion limits the potential of now  
  Say what you mean  
  Share your enthusiasm  
  Show what you are feeling  
  Smile and enjoy the reaction that it returns  
  Stay 5 minutes longer than you want to  
  The world moves at it's own pace, so don't get frustrated because it's pace is different to yours  
  There are many injustices in the world - minimise their impact  
  Try not to react whilst emotional  
  We decide whether something is good or bad. Make it good  
  What is happening to you is only happening to you  
  You are only number one on your own list of priorities  
  You aren't reacting to others - you are reacting to how others react to you  
  You can listen without giving an opinion, answer or resolution  
  You can't fight every battle, so choose them wisely  
  You can't always control what happens to you, but you can control how you react to it  
  You don't have answers - you have opinions based upon what you know up to this time  
  You have no idea what somebody else is going through  
  Your value to others is their calculation