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  Dec 2012
Jan 2013
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Mar 2013
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  Aug 2013  
  Tuesday 3rd September

Sitting here having a cup of tea and this man farted in my direction with such severity that I think the milk curdled.

A fine of $4.92 for such poor form.

  Friday 6th September

The pissing and spitting man is back and earning a crust cleaning windscreens.

However, having seen the water bottle and noting that it is slightly yellow and has a head on it, I don't think that I'd want that heading my way.

A $0.79 fine for dodgy work practices.

  Saturday 7th September

Having a quiet breakfast in Oscar Cooper, and there were two chaps next to me who were clearly in a new relationship where one of them was particularly needy and over-enthusiastic - and was annoying the crap out of me. Some quotes from him as he squealed:

"I can tag you in here? That's the first time you've let me tag you. This is great" (the modern world)

"I was going to ask you for coffee but I don't drink coffee." (pointless)

"I can't believe that they've sold out of tickets. I called yesterday and they had some." (the world doesn't stop for you)

"Wow! I was going to order that as well" (dear god)

A fine of $3.27 for being painful.

  Thursday 12th September

We all need to earn a crust, but really? Is he a man who stands there playing air guitar or just a knob?

I fine him $0.35 for drifting into the latter category.

  Saturday 14th September

For sitting at the next table to me in a nice Thai restaurant, the fine is for smelling of B O and will cost you a $4.58 fine.

  Monday 16th September

I sat there and watched these two cars pull up. The occupants were unloading and carrying all their stuff off. Next to them were two other parking spaces.

So why did they park in the diabled spaces?

No sign of their disabilities stopping them lugging all their stuff off for some fishing in the rain.

So for taking this brazen liberty, I fine you $10.87.

  Tuesday 17th September

It's great that your grandson shuts up when you incessantly bang two spoons together, but how about you shut the hell up you troll.

A $2.22 fine for annoying everyone but the kid.

  Saturday 21st September

I am the one with random fines.

For choosing $541 as a fine amount, I fine you $5.41 for doing the randomness of the amount.

  Thursday 26th September

For really bad hair sense and also hiding a woman's body beneath his shirt, a gentle fine of $1.51

  Thursday 26th September


The crimes are many, so the fine is $12.83.

Start from the shoes and work up.


  Thursday 26th September

This may seem unfair, but I am fining this chap $0.47 for delaying my journey by me having to move all the way around him.

  Friday 27th September

Upon arrival
12 hours later

Started the day in Las Vegas - flew to Salt Lake City - flew on to Denver.

A fine of $76.71 to Delta Airways as they have misplaced our luggage.


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