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Wednesday 5th June

At the induction at Phillip Island:

"There were approximtely 183 houses here."

Um ... there were exactly 183 houses, so I fine you $1.83

  Thursday 6th June

What are these 7 days of the week of which you speak?

Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.

So the 7th is called Fineday and it comes to $2.52

  Sunday 9th June


I have seen lots of dreadlocks and don't have an issue with them.

But to stand behind this smelly filth leads me to fine him $3.97 - yuk.

  Monday 17th June

There have been some bad smells encountered over my years and this chaps breath is right in the mix.

I don't know what he had eaten, but it can't smell any worse when it comes out than what I experienced sitting opposite him on the tram.

So for having poo breath, I fine him $5.02


Thursday 20th June

Luke Ball: "We were all kids at some stage".

Ummmm - what stage would that be? You mean when we were kids?

That's $1.40 for talking drivel, you idiot.

  Friday 21st June

Maybe I should just feel grateful that a full day for me goes beyond 3pm, but this doesn't forgive this wording so that is the standard fine of $3.50 for this exact crime.

Somebody has to take a stand and that person is me.

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